The Average Gal VS The Ginger Ale

I came home with bags of groceries after work tonight and opened the fridge to start putting stuff away ....ACK yup needs a clean out.  I pull out old stuff and gave it a quick wipe, the whole time eye-balling and semi ignoring the 3 large glass bottles of homemade Ginger Ale. 
"I really should pour those out" I said to Padmé who was poking her nose into the bags of food.

*side note - I made this ginger ale last summer, it was supposed to be fizzy after 3 days.  When I tried it after 3 days then 7 days later, no dice.  I left them in fridge thinking I could still use the mixture somewhere as even though it wasn't fizzy it WAS rather tasty. *

I pulled the three bottles out placed them on the counter and popped open one.  SWEET MOTHER OF PEARL it was like that Geyser at Yellowstone National Park.  It was like someone took a bottle of champagne, shook it for a millennium and then handed it to me laughing like a jack ass.... Padmé RAN for her LIFE! I stood paralised... what was happening .. WHY was this happening... the stuff was flat!  It took mere seconds for the entire bottle (minus a small amount) to spray up and around my kitchen.  Most of the 1.5 litres was now running down my counter top on to my tile floor, splashed up above on my cabinets, microwave dripping, the fridge across from the counter, dripping... OHHHH NOOOOEEEESSSS!

I pulled every tea towel I own (which is an amazing amount, I have come to the realisation this evening) out and started to mop it all up.  My socks - soaked through, my pants, splattered and wet... my dog... no where to be found (heart of lion Padmé has).  Her food soaked through and mushy, water bowl, topped up.  What a flippin mess!

After wiping it all up, I was left with a nasty sticky mess, so I have had to also wash all my floors, all my cabinets, my microwave, fridge and counter tops.

Lessons learned:

1. 1.5 litres can cover A HUGE area, when sprayed
2. Flat homemade ginger ale will eventually fiz up if you leave it long enough
3. my awesome video game reflexes has diminished in my old age
4. Padmé is afraid of flying ginger ale and piles of wet floor mats and tea towels..
5. Swiffer wet works well on sticky ginger ale floors

*sigh*

I'm exhausted, I think I will have a strong cup of tea and maybe a biscuit.